Once upon a time I used to do things. I used to go places and plan weekend and day getaways and now I feel like I don't do anything. There came a point when I moved out of my parents house and into an apartment with my boyfriend that everything came to a standstill. Before I moved out when I got my paycheck it was mine. It wasn't the cable companies, or the electric companies or one of the many credit card companies I owe money to, it was mine. I was lucky enough to have parents who paid most of my bills and who never asked for rent money in return. I lived at home for free. I think back on that time now and wonder why I didn't save my money. I would be so much better off. But then I think the money that I did spend was well spent. I got to go out and experience things many people will never be able to do. I took in Broadway play after Broadway play, went to any concert and comedy show my heart desired and I spent many glorious weekends indulging in my love of history at museums. I learned things I never would have fully appreciated if I didn't experience it first hand. I toured the mansions in Newport Rhode Island, more then once and I only hope I can find the time and the funds to go back again.I walked the grave yards in Salem Massachussetts and visited the house of Seven Gables. I spent time in Mystic Connecticut and attended the Renaissance Faire in Tuxedo New York more times then I can count. Manhattan is only give or take an hour and half away from where I live and I have visited The Met, The Whitney, The Guggenheim, Ripley's Believe it or Not, Madame Tussauds, Statue of Liberty, Ellis Island, Empire State Building, Central Park (every chance I get), South Street Seaport, China Town, the list goes on an on.
I used to look forward to planning these trips. It was something I did. Something I loved. I would have print outs of all of the places and would even go as far as Googling restaurants and other attractions that were near by. I over planned. My boyfriend always made fun of me, he's more of the go with the flow type of guy. However, it was my thing. It made me happy, gave me something to look forward to. Now I feel like I don't have that anymore. I miss the days where I could just say I want to go to the Bronx Zoo on Sunday and Sunday morning we would get up bright and early and be at the Zoo before noon. Now it's oh let me chekc my schedule I think I have a bridal shower that day or is it a baby shower. Maybe I've just bitter. Maybe this whole growing up process came too soon for me. I feel like I am still young and still have so much to see and do while my friends are settling down, buying houses and starting families. Is 25 old? Do I need to forget about the fun, eventful life I used to live and accept that life has gotten in the way of me having a life? Because really what is the fun it that?
I have planned out a few weekend trips and day trips in the past few months the only problem is I never get to them. The print outs and well planned itineraries have all started to collect dust. I haven't been to the Bronx Zoo in almost two years. I used to go twice a year at least. I haven't made it into Manhattan in months (other than going to see American Idiot for my mom's Birthday), I haven't even been to the beach more than once this summer. Then as I type away I wonder if I'm ungrateful and if people will look at me as a whiner. I should be thrilled that I have experienced so much and have been fortunate enough to go out and see things, but that's the problem. I know how fortunate I am, but once you know the lifestyle of experiencing life and somehow you get sucked up into adulthood and responsibilities it's kind of depressing to look back at all you used to do.
I used to want to write a book about Long Island and New York about all of the the fun things it has to offer. I was going to title it "Never Say There is Nothing to do" I even started writing it. I had over 150 places and sadly to say I had only been to maybe 30 of them, but I had every intention of visiting every place I compiled for the book. I never did. Maybe I need to stop venting and wallowing in my self pity and I need to just go out and do whatever it is I desire. Money may be tight, time may be sparse but that doesn't mean I can't plan ahead. I'm taking a stand right now. I plan on resorting back to my old life before I grew up at least once a month in order to get that feeling of anticipation and excitement back. I just need to figure out where I want to go first. Hmm.. I have a list a mile long:
- Philadelphia (Haven't been since 5th grade)
- Williamsburg, Virginia
- Washington DC (I have never been and the Smithsonian is calling my name)
- Rock and Roll Hall of Fame
- Mark Twains House (CT)
- Vermont
And for places more local which are definitely more obtainable:
- NYC Aquarium (I went in winter and I think it'd be better in warmer weather)
- The Cloisters
- Walking Across the Brooklyn Bridge
- A needed trip to the Bronx Zoo
- International Center of Photography
- The Galleries in Chelsea
- A Big Onion Walking Tour
- Frozen Hot Chocolate at Serendipity
I could keep going, but I am going to stop myself. Unfortunately this Sunday is out of the question since I will be attending a BBQ at my boyfriends parent's house (which in all honesty I don't mind at all). Then next week I have a bachelorette party to attend. Hmm. This may be harder then I thought. No! I will do it. And to make myself I will blog about it. I'm also going to start doing something for myself everyday. Whether it be getting a haircut, sitting outside reading a good book, or treating myself to ice cream. I think it's about time I stop being so down in the dumps and start getting myself back on track. I look forward to writing about my upcoming adventures (as I like to call them) stay tuned it may get interesting.
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